Fake Saint of the Year

Translator: Tsukii

Editor: Evelet

Read at Watashi wa Sugoi Desu!

Kofi-sponsored chapter! Thanks to MONKE for sponsoring!

After Story: Fake Saint Goes to Japan (4)

Using the investigation of the strange land as my justification, I returned to Japan!

Once again, I slipped out of the empty room of the apartment and said to myself, let’s go1 to the town.

By the way, because the previous inhabitant of my empty room — in other words, my past life-self — suddenly died, it was branded a problematic property.

Because of that, I could come and go as I liked so I was thankful. Please let it stay as an empty room from now on.

Well then, today I felt like eating curry.

So I decided to go immediately to the nearby curry shop.

Hm? What about my original intention of buying a game console and playing “Kuon no Sanka,” you ask?

…Aah, I gave up on that….

I wandered around all the stores, but I couldn’t find any place that sold it. It was sold out everywhere.

The newest game console could download the game directly, but those game consoles were also sold out.

So I had no choice but to change my plans and eat something delicious instead.

Well, there was no way everything could go as planned in this world.

However, as I walked normally on the sidewalk, I felt gazes on me just like I had before.

Even so, I was already used to being the object of stares, so I didn’t mind it. Just look all you want.

Although I was a fake, my seventeen years of life experience as a Saint wasn’t just for show.

As a fake Saint, I needed to appear more real than the real thing, so I’d cheated using magic. Anyway, I put a lot of effort into my appearance. There wouldn’t be a problem with my looks no matter where or from which angle they saw me.

There was a young man who seemed to be a college student who stood dumbfounded as he looked at me, so I gave him a light smile.

There, you have been given the fake Saint’s smile. Be happy with this.

As I was smiling, I saw a car rear-end the car in front of it, which was stopped by the traffic light, and the impact stopped all the traffic behind it.

Fortunately, nobody seemed to be injured, but… ah~ah, the car was a wreck. And it was blocking the road now.

That was dangerous. Look ahead properly as you drive. Why was the driver looking over here?

“U-uhm! Excuse me, I’m Usoji Yanai2 from OX entertainment production. If you’re interested in being an entertainer…”

As I walked this time, a person who looked like a scout for an entertainment company approached me and offered me his business card. 

Hee, it was a common development in manga or anime, but was this person really what he seemed?

Well, it was probably a scam anyway, right? Sorry, I have no interest in such things.

If it was the plot of a pulp novel, then I would be taken to a small, private room. A few rod roles would be there and say things like, “Ooh, you brought a good one this time,” as they locked the door so the woman couldn’t escape. Then, as they surrounded me, they would say, “It’s okay, it’s necessary for your audition.” As they began to do some light petting, they would naturally begin to restrain the girl. When I began to think it was strange, it would already be too late and the harassment would begin to escalate to a major catastrophe. It was expected that, while she was frustrated, she would twitch a lot. I was quite familiar with that type of plotline. 3

So I just ignored the fake scout and passed him by, hurrying ahead.

However, for some reason people were gathering in the area ahead of me, blocking the road. What the heck was this?

“Damn! Has the ambulance not arrived yet?!” 

In the center of the circle of people, I could hear a seemingly hurried voice. 

As I peeked, there was a middle-aged man who had collapsed and another middle-aged man who was desperately performing CPR4.

Hoo, so someone collapsed and another was trying to save him.

However, the people around were just watching from afar without really doing anything.

Well, I understood that there was nothing for them to do after calling for an ambulance and waiting for AED to come. 

…The ambulance had been called, right? It couldn’t be a situation where it “Turns out nobody! Had called for an ambulance!” because they all thought someone else had done it, right?

“No good! Because of the rear-end collision over there, the ambulance had been delayed!” 

As I heard a man screaming in panic from the same direction I had come from, I remembered the accident that had happened earlier. 

Ah — so it was due to driving without looking ahead.

He sure was out of luck; to think the ambulance had been coming from that direction.

They could only turn around to take another road, but it was doubtful whether or not they could make it in time.

…Rather, was this my fault?

The person who drove without looking ahead had clearly been staring at me, after all…

No, it was the fault of the fool who drove without looking ahead, not me, but… it could be said that I was indirectly responsible for the accident.

Ah — It couldn’t be helped.

I squeezed through a circle of people and sat near the collapsed middle-aged man.

The person who was performing CPR stopped his hands as he looked at me, dumbfounded.

Hey, don’t stop moving. Continue.

For the time being, I put my hand on the collapsed middle-aged man’s chest and used magic to apply electricity to pump his heart.

I also restored his ribs that had been broken with my healing magic.

I didn’t know whether his ribs had been broken by an accident or the intense CPR.

Anyway, I confirmed that the middle-aged man was breathing again, so I decided to leave silently.

“Wa, wait! Just now… it looked like he was breathing again just by you putting your hand on him, but…” 

Don’t call me; it’s annoying. 

I wanted to hurry away and eat curry.

Since I couldn’t just ignore him, I turned toward the man who had done CPR. Since it would be troublesome to call attention to myself, I decided to push all the responsibility to him.

However, this man who did the CPR sure had some muscles LOL. Was he a bodybuilder or something?

“I didn’t do anything. He just happened to start breathing again at the moment I thought to help. I think your life-saving measures were just that good.” 

I pushed all the credit to the CPR man. Then I immediately escaped the scene. 

However, there was a fool who brought his smartphone and pointed his camera at me. He kept a certain distance as he followed me.

Fuhn? You want to do such a thing?

Then I will prank you just a bit.

I used wind magic where it wasn’t noticeable to conjure a gust of wind that made Stalker-kun drop his smartphone.

The fallen smartphone went into the drainage ditch as it was. Shoot! Super! Exciting!

“UWAAAAH! MY SMARTPHONEEEE!” 

Serves you right. 

Well, I think you can ask the vendor’s help to retrieve it, so do your best.

By the way, the curry I ate at the shop later was very delicious.


Net! News.

[A general respondent who was too beautiful actually looked similar to a certain game heroine?!]

6/13(Wed) 20:22 report

Right now, are you aware that a certain picture has become a popular topic on the internet? 

It was a picture that was taken three days ago, during the 18:00 broadcast of “Reversal Quiz Runner” on 6/10 (Sun). It appeared around 18:23 for only a few seconds.

This show is about entertainers, and general challengers had to answer various quiz questions and pass through obstacles to compete for first place. It has recorded a high audience rating rate since it began a year ago.

The general correct answer rate is displayed for each question. After the question has been completed, the members of the general public who answered the question might be broadcast in the form of street interviews.

On the Sunday, 6/10 broadcast, they had asked the question, “Of Shiba Inu and Siberian Husky, which is genetically closer to a wolf?” The person who answered was broadcast like normal, but the person who appeared at this time became a hot topic across the internet.

It was a blonde green-eyed foreign-looking woman who instantly grabbed the viewer’s heart. Although she only appeared for about ten seconds, the whole studio was silent as they looked, then she became a hot topic on the internet.

The name of this person was totally unknown, but it was said that she resembled a character that appeared in the game “Kuon no Sanka ~ Fiore caduto eterna~.” Because of that, it was assumed that she was a cosplayer of this character.

There was a movement to search for her whereabouts on the internet, and there was also a movement to collect reports of her sighting. However, they were aware that it would be annoying if everyone were to flock together.

For those people who are excited, please calm down and remember to act rationally.

Flying Onigashima5

@zyugemu26

There was a middle-aged man who suddenly collapsed on the roadside, yet when another person tried his best to save his life and the Saint appeared.

Was this a healing magic?

By the way, the location was in front of the intersection, which was about 5 minutes walking distance from Curry No. 2 in front of Sunetori7 Station.

#Heart massage #Live saving activities #Elrise #Kuon no Sanka 

18:16 July 2nd, 2020

150,000 retweet and quote retweets 110,000 likes

Loyal Doggo8 

@gogouno

It was totally a 2.5D which made me LOL. There was no way this was reality…

Truant Pheasant 

@suri

That was totally a photoshopped image, right? … It is edited, right?

Betrayer Monkey 

@kire

If I saw this person IRL my heart would also stop. Please massage my heart.

Lonely Momotarou 

@kaijari

The one who did the CPR is a muscular middle-aged man, you know.

Old man who mows his lawn too much 

@suigyono

It was a life of wanting to be heart-massaged by the Saint-sama.

BBA who mastered laundry9 

@suigyou

This totally looks like Elrise-sama, you know?

Turtle who never forgives the act of throwing away a turtle10

@matu

The uncle who did the rescuing was massaging with great momentum, LOL. Rather, he used too much muscle…

Is he a pro wrestler or something?

Tarou who is on the verge of senility 

@unraimatu

He was too well-built, LOL. He might end up killing him instead.

Old woman who collects stones11

@huuraimatu

Of course if you get CPR with that max power level, he would.

FisherMAN 

@kuunerutokoroni

Rather, those photographers did nothing, just watching the whole time.

Even after they called for an ambulance and needed AED to come, they only stood there and recorded… isn’t it too fucked up, to say the least?

The wolf is always defeated12. 

@sumutokoro

Seriously. On top of that, the people in front took a close up picture of the person who collapsed.

You could get arrested for this, you know.

Sturdy straw house13 

@yaburakouzino

Rather, seriously speaking, what did Elrise-sama(temp) do there?

Brick house that is more brittle than tofu 

@burakouzi

He seems to just happen to start breathing again the moment she puts her hand on him… but the timing was too precise for that.

Self-destructing tree house 

@paipopaipo2

Why is my bride there?

Blood-soaked red riding hood 

@paipono

Hah? She’s my bride, you know?

Stone soup14

@syurinngan

She’s Vernell’s bride.

Golden Tarou15

@gurindai

Her hair looks really soft. I want to fluff it.

Tempered glass slippers.16

@ponpokopi

Police, come over here.

Oni of public welfare17

@tyoukyuu

Seriously speaking, don’t rush to the scene and cause trouble there. It could be considered a crime in some cases.

— On the internet, the topic of Elrise appearing in reality was heating up. 

Of course, practically no one really thought that the “Game character stepped into reality!”

They might appear sloppy on the internet, but they still had their common sense.

That was why they thought it was absolutely impossible for a game character to actually come to life in reality.

However… The person who was here right now was different.

She closed the net news and SNS that were speaking about Elrise, and slumped back to her seat as she sighed.

“…That’s the real one, isn’t it?” 

A black haired woman muttered this. 

Her face was quite good, but since she was in her own house, she didn’t put on her makeup, thus not actually using it to its full potential.

She looked at the video which showed Elrise over and over, and came to one conclusion.

…That Elrise was the real deal. She truly came from the other world.

There was a reason why she thought of that. It was because she was the only person who was aware that the world on the other side… Fiori… really existed.

Originally, she lived on the other side for about a thousand years.

After she lived enough, she entrusted the rest of her lifespan to Elrise and died… and was reborn as human in this world.

Therefore, she was convinced that this Elrise was, without a doubt, the real one.

“Elrise… you, why did you come to this reality…?” 

Her name was Yamoto Tamaki — her name in their past life had been Propheter, the Prophet. 


A/N:

By the way, the “turtle who never forgives the act of throwing away a turtle” in the story above is Yamoto-san.

Want early access to Fake Saint and Executed Sage? Support the translator on Patreon! Also, check out their latest project, Melancholy of the Demon Army Officer. It’s a Rance fanfic, sort of like a prequel to the main story.

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Kzalca
Kzalca
11 days ago

REUNION TIME!
Thanks for the translation!

Canelé
Canelé
14 days ago

LOL “turtle who never forgives the act of throwing away a turtle”… Even in the next life she still never forgive Alfrea HAHAHAH

ChiffonPink
ChiffonPink
24 days ago

This is what I was expecting, Elrise and the turtle reunion. Will Elrise tell her about how she was Fudou?
Also, I think I never said this: thanks for all the chapters.

tsukii
tsukii
23 days ago
Reply to  ChiffonPink

i doubt elrise will tell her, but whether propheter found out is different though

177103
177103
25 days ago

Is there more AF chapter?

tsukii
tsukii
25 days ago
Reply to  177103

there is. AF up to AF12 while SS that follows up to SS4b, thus grand total 13 remaining(author said they will make another set once the 2nd volume of ln released(maybe next year?) so that’s all for now)

177103
177103
25 days ago
Reply to  tsukii

Wtf??…2nd volume?…so this story not ended right?

tsukii
tsukii
25 days ago
Reply to  177103

the one on this site is web novel and ended. as for light novel volume, i didn’t read myself so i dunno, but i think it include up to 20 wn chapter worth for volume 1? with extra caveat like ln exclusive chapter or something?

Last edited 25 days ago by tsukii
X07Zero
X07Zero
25 days ago

Thank for the chapter ^^

So many references in this chapter, really good job translated this Tsukii-san ^^

tsukii
tsukii
25 days ago
Reply to  X07Zero

i tried to find the reference i could, but i still didn’t know what the stone soup refer to…

X07Zero
X07Zero
25 days ago
Reply to  tsukii

Hmmm, since there’s also only one reference for Kintaro and Cinderella so it’s likely to refer to the story of Stone Soup you mention ^^

tsukii
tsukii
25 days ago
Reply to  X07Zero

maybe, i just not sure

Lagmaster64
Lagmaster64
25 days ago

this work was very good! dying to laugh is the norm here!

tsukii
tsukii
25 days ago
Reply to  Lagmaster64

its an honor for us for you to enjoy our work!

ggfbank
ggfbank
25 days ago

It is 7 ss and Vernell (supposed) protagonist-kun only appeared once by name lol.
Supple has more appearance than him.

tsukii
tsukii
25 days ago
Reply to  ggfbank

its after story. side story is completely different plot

uixtamaki
uixtamaki
25 days ago

thanks for the chapter.

Majesh
Majesh
25 days ago

That’s the real one innit?
Man, If I was Elrise then I wouldn’t be able to return to Fiori. The internet mate, it’s a fooken black hole.

tsukii
tsukii
25 days ago
Reply to  Majesh

she obligated to return every now and then to report. otherwise other side will get too worried and chase after her despite the danger, leading them to almost certain death